Who Still Needs Matrimony?

I came across an article in an Austrian newspaper this week by Theresa Kamp, entitled “Do we still need marriage? Between Romance and Law: Why Getting Married Can Make Sense Even Today.” (“Brauchen wir die Ehe noch? Zwischen Romantik und Recht: Warum Heiraten auch heute sinnvoll sein kann” Der Standard. March 10, 2026).

Interestingly enough, even though Kamp is a divorce lawyer, she is trying to make the argument that maybe matrimony isn’t as useless as our modern society often makes it out to be. In addition to its legal securities, she says we shouldn’t lose sight of the emotional aspect of being married, noting the idea of the union and the pair’s deciding for each other, planning to stay together “in good and bad times,” is, after all, a fine idea, even if most call it trite.

That’s about as close as Kamp gets to mentioning anything about some kind of spiritual union, let alone anything about the Church or God. I guess I’m just more and more out of touch with the culture around me, but I was really surprised that she doesn’t even acknowledge any kind of religious motivations for marriage.

Thinking surely someone in the comment section would say something about this oversight, I came across a ridiculous rant about marriage being an invention of the Catholic church so that men wouldn’t go “whoring around” and that as a relic from the medieval ages, it should be abolished. Only one comment among many mentioned marriage as a sacrament where God partners with the pair and bears them up when times get rough.

You can’t really draw any momentous conclusions from one article from Europe, but it really makes me wonder about the cultural, nonchalant iconoclasm of today. As a Christian, I find myself more and more disconnected from so much of what those around me seem to understand as incontrovertible givens.

My understanding of matrimony sees it as something sacramental and profound. Our rector has been doing a Sunday School series on the Nicene Creed in this year that marks its 1,700th anniversary. He’s been emphasizing the ontological nature of our Triune God’s having one essence on the one hand, but on the other, the economical nature of the three persons of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost each having their different roles. He reminded us that the Church has always understood that will is tied to nature and not to person, so the Trinity has only one will or divine nature.

In talking about the economical aspect of the Trinity, when we say that the Spirit proceedeth from the Father and the Son, our rector pointed out a similar instance in the Genesis story when Eve was created out of Adam, two persons, but one essence, their will unified both and they were unified with God, but the serpent divided this common will and the fall brought about selfishness, pride, suspicion, etc.

The Spirit is about making us whole again, though, sanctifying Christians through sacraments like baptism, communion, and matrimony. Our rector noted that husband and wife are an icon of Christ and his Church that are being redeemed to return to one perfect, unified will.

The opening question of the marriage service stresses the will of the man and the woman:

WILT thou have this Woman to thy wedded wife, to live together after God’s ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou love her, comfort her, honour, and keep her in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, keep thee only unto her, so long as ye both shall live? (BCP 1928)

These two wills are being sanctified and brought together in a unity that will bear the fruits of the Spirit more and more:

O GOD, who hast so consecrated the state of Matrimony that in it is represented the spiritual marriage and unity betwixt Christ and his Church; Look mercifully upon these thy servants, that they may love, honour, and cherish each other, and so live together in faithfulness and patience, in wisdom and true godliness, that their home may be a haven of blessing and of peace; through the same Jesus Christ our Lord, who liveth and reigneth with thee and the Holy Spirit ever, one God, world without end. Amen. (BCP 1928)

My wife and I are celebrating 35 years this year and we both can only confirm what a gift our marriage has been and is — we highly recommend it!

O merciful God, confirm and strengthen us; that, as we grow in age, we may grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. Amen. (BCP 1928)